Sunday, January 2, 2011

Vignette: Me and My Muse

"Are you writing?"


"Why not?"

"Because I'm too full of thoughts."

"Shouldn't that be the best time to write?"

"No. They won't come out. It's like one of those big cans of fruit punch, if you don't punch an air hole. When it's full, you can't pour it out neatly, because there's no air flowing in, and it splurts and splashes."

"That's a really strange metaphor."


"Whatever. And they don't make those cans of fruit punch any more, so nobody's going to know what you mean."

"Fine. You asked."

"So why not punch an air hole?"

"If I knew how, I would."

"Maybe that's what those people who drill holes in their skulls are trying to do. Like Egon in Ghostbusters."

"Let's not go there."

"Is this conversation helping the air flow at all?"

"Only in the sense that it's keeping me typing."

"So what do you think I'm going to say next?"

"I think you're going to stand there and annoy me while I Google to make sure that I've got the definition of simile and metaphor right."

"Do you?"

"Yes. Look, I just figured out who you are. Aren't you supposed to be giving me something to write about here? And aren't you supposed to be female and wearing diaphanous Greek robes?"

"Not in the mood today."

"Well, I've written my two hundred words. So get out."

Image: Wikimedia Commons.


  1. This was really funny--glad I found it. Happy New Year!

  2. Just found your blog....I'll be back to read more.

    Victoria, Bellingham, WA

  3. I love that! You are a very good writer. That doesn´t help the worries, or the not wanting to go back to work (so with you on that one!), but maybe it improves the mood :)

  4. HAHAHAH! Oh this made me laugh so hard.

    - Lauren

    Ladaisi Blog

  5. Howdy, Queen Cupcake! Thank you! Happy New Year to you, too!

  6. Greetings, Casey! Welcome! And please do come back!

  7. Ladaisi! I'm very happy when I make you laugh. :)

  8. Hey, Olfactoria! Thank you! Yep, it was a mood improver, though I'm still wanting to jump back under the vacation covers, as it were.

  9. I really enjoyed going through your blog.
    Happy New Year!
    Isn't there a 'follow' button, or did I miss it?

  10. nice blog...intelligent posts dear they all are awesome i'm lovin 'em all.Your point of view is just amazing.
    I might spam your blog yet inviting you to have a view of my blog when free..
    do leave me some comment / guide if can.. if interested can follow blog...

  11. Thanks, OnePerfectDay! Happy New year to you, too!

    There should (I think) be a Follow up at the top in the Blogger bar, or a few inches down on the left there's an RSS reader subscription button.

  12. Thanks, Arvind! Actually, I can get to your blog by clicking your name.

  13. Once again you've nailed it. You are such a clever writer, one day a big fat book contract is going to land in your lap! Hope it's what you want. :)

  14. Hey, Christine! Thank you! Hee. :) That would be nice.